Thursday, July 31, 2008

OMG! He Thinks He's Got Another 8 in Him

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If you follow the pattern Billmon sets up in his diary here in the Daily Kos, then McCain believes he's got another eight years in him and he can run for president in 4 years again.

See, he's got Rove's boys working for him. And if he follows the pattern set up seen in Billmon's diary, then he'll fire Rove's boys and decry their methods saying he was led astray by the shiny badge of the presidency, but now he knows better.

Think in 4 years, he'll get the hang of running for president? He'll only be 76.

 
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John McCain - Celebrity

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Click here to see Google's cache of McCain's website before they and the media went off on Obama's celebrity.

McCain equals hypocrite.

 
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Billmon's back!!!!

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Who is Billmon you ask and why do I seem so... so... excited about this?

Billmon was the proprietor of Whiskey Bar, a writer whose prowess I could only admire from afar, much like Digby of Hullaballoo. I have Whiskey Bar still linked on some of my old blogs but the link's been dead since soon after the last elections.

He visited Egypt and the descriptions he wrote made the air around me seem as hot and arid as he described, while scenes of Egyptian streets and life unfolded in my mind's eye.

He calls it as as it is and he doesn't mince words. And he's as disgusted as ever over the media and our politics.

Go on, read. Drink in every word as if it's smooth whiskey. Then, when you're done, exhale. He's great, isn't he?

 
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Wednesday, July 30, 2008

"Burn..."

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Yesterday, L.A. had an earthquake of 5.8. Somewhere in downtown L.A., Danceteach was stuck in a building which had to be inspected for damage before they'd let anyone out. During the time of imprisonment, Danceteach texted me his complaints and told me how the rollers in the building exacerbated feelings to the point where people screamed. I forgot to ask what floor he was on.

I blame Danceteach for the following.

At 6 this morning, my mind dreamt this. Oh, I do so love my mind sometimes.

Bratworse and I were in San Francisco, in a building somewhere. We split up and I went to go find the person whom I was supposed to be meeting. Along the way, my dream-self ran into some people I was hoping to avoid, but of course in dreams, we HAVE to run into them. As I said my goodbyes to them, an earthquake struck.

Flashforward (as dreams do). I'm in a hallway, surrounded by pushing people. I'm looking for Bratworse, my panic increases.

Flashforward again. I'm spilling out into the streets with throngs of people, screaming out her name when I look across the street and there she is, standing with two people and waving at me.

Flashforward again. I'm by her side. Turns out the two people by her side are my mom and her sister, my aunt. Funny how in dreams you don't question such obvious contradictions... Bratworse wouldn't be able to pick my mom out of a crowd I think. I'm looking around frantically for what to do next when I see a HUGE ASS LINE across the street and policemen are trying to get people to go to the back of the line.

"I think that line's for the Bay Bridge." I gesture to the three of them.

My aunt waves a hand, "You go ahead. I'm not going to make it."

My mother starts harumphing and saying, "If that's what she wants, let her."

"Come on," I urge, "We'll be with you the whole way. Just..." Right then, out of the corner of my eye, I see a caucasian duck into an alley, carrying a bundle of satiny clothes. That's strange, I thought to myself as I urge my aunt more.

Just as I get my aunt to her feet and I point out to her how far the line's dwindled (There was actually no line to speak of at this point), I notice the caucasian emerge from the other end of the alley, wearing priest vestments and holding a picket sign. He starts yelling out something about gays and lesbians....

And my dream-mind snaps.

There was just an earthquake. I have Bratworse with me. I have two crotchety, stubborn 70 something year old ladies (and I use the terms loosely) who have spent their entire lives one-upping each other and arguing, with me. We have to walk like 20 miles to try and get to safety. And this guy... this guy wants to get in my face and tell me my lifestyle caused this earthquake.

I pick up a stick and start chasing the guy, just as other fags and dykes and queers around me do. I run after this "priest" and as I hurl my stick at the fleeing figure, I scream out "BURN IN HELL!"....

only to find out I screamed out in real life "BURN...." and managed to suppress "in hell" in time to stop from really waking up Bratworse.

I sit up in bed, pissed and wheezing. Only then did I realize my brain concocted this whole thing to get me to wake up and adjust my body temperature to stave off an asthma attack.

 
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Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Emailing on the iPhone

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So far I've been happy with most of the iPhone's features. The one that I'm having the most trouble with, is the email program. For some reason, my iPhone has a hard time updating my emails. It's very frustrating.

From what I can tell, it has a hard time going from one network to another... so getting emails on the run is hard. If you go from an EDGE network to a wifi to a 3G while it's trying to get the emails, it seems to get hung up.

If it starts while it's on one network and stays on that network, the emails are okay but for me, I work in a really lousy network area. Literally rolling the car forward 6 inches can mean no network to a 3G one.

Other than that, I'm still deliriously happy with it. Wish this can be fixed though.

 
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Monday, July 28, 2008

Three Branches

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So I'm reading responses to ABC's U.S. Headed for 'Heightened Alert' Stage which is another name for U.S. Crying "Wolf" and I come across this little response from a right-winger down in Florida.
"In the U.S., the Republicans are in charge of 2 of the 3 branches of government."Last I heard Pelosi was the MAJORITY leader in the House and Reid was the MAJORITY leader in the senate. they are the ones who bring bills to the floor, as I am sure you know. so, to me, they are the ones in control of our government
Umm, last I heard, The Senate and House were both part of Congress and that is only ONE branch of the government, the legislative branch? The other two branches are the executive and the judicial. Sheesh, at least get your facts right. Oh but wait... I forgot... these are the people who care more about having a president you will drink beer with, than facts.

 
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Insurance Tips #1: Merging Companies

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If Company A is buying Company B in the middle of a month, Company B's following month's medical coverage will need to be terminated by Company B's broker/or Company B itself. Company A's broker can try to, but it's looking like insurance carriers use that as an excuse to disregard the termination notice and charge an extra month.

Can they do this and is it legal? Yes and yes.

Legally, only Company B and its representative, the broker, can make changes to their policy. Therefore, any notice by Company A and their broker can "legally" be disregarded by insurance carriers. Does it make sense common sense-wise? Hell no, but these ARE insurance companies we're talking about. Anything to maximize the profits, no?

 
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Saturday, July 26, 2008

Dyke Ducks?

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So yesterday we went fishing with Ranger Robb and there were these two ducks swimming along. Mind you, in past years we've seen pairs of male and female ducks, but this time we were treated to the sight of two female ducks together.

"Dyke Ducks!" exclaimed each of us in turn as we sighted them. One of them had a more colorful head where you could see shimmers of a deep green. I pointed that one out, "The butch one!"

Even cross-species, dykes tend to hang out with each other.

Picture was taken with my iPhone and cropped by iPhoto but not touched up.

 
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iPhone blogging

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Well, I'm using the iPhone to blog this just to see how it'd go. A tad slow going but otherwise quite sufficient.

What do you all think?

 
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Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Still in Love, Though It's Cracked

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It skulked in the darkness, knowing that the gate would soon open and the enemy would show its face. Patiently, it waited for its owners to finish their discussion and sure enough, the gate opened!

At the precise moment, it leapt!

It glanced back at its owner as if to say wish me luck, then spun around in a slow twirl to face the enemy.

Alas, even though the ambush was picture perfect, it didn't count on the fact the enemy would be so unyielding in its defense. Not one slight fraction of an inch did the enemy give.


The impact of the ambush left its face scarred. Its owner snatched it up and cradled it as she examined the damage.

"It's cracked," said the owner.

The owner brushed a finger along the skin and pressed down to make sure nothing's broken.

"It's still working though," as a sniff crept into the owner's voice.

"You're kidding!" the owner's wife exclaimed in disbelief, her eyes blinking, stupefied.

"No, see?" The owner held it up and sure enough, the owner's wife saw the spidery crack up the side of the iPhone. "It hit the cement. Can we get it fixed?" The love in the owner's voice was obvious, as well as in the owner's wife's voice too.

Their concern touched it. It let out a sigh as it went back to sleep. Even though the enemy, the cement, won this time, there would be another chance.... it's owners were going to get surgery for it. It just hoped it won't be plastic surgery.

 
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Tuesday, July 22, 2008

On Hold

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If I didn't have the internet, my current job would make me go postal, I think. Most of my time is spent on hold, listening to jazzy muzak but muzak nonetheless.

I think the worst part of the job has to do with speaking to automated dumbasses on the phone. Everyone I've worked with here at one point has screamed into the phone "AGENT!" (Thanks Blue Cross, HATE your system)

I've been on hold with AIG now for 18 minutes. Sometimes I wonder if it's just a delaying tactic on their behalf... you know, keep you on hold until you hang up in frustration.

Earlier today, I had an experience with an ambulance company in which they said that it would take them 45 days (45!!!!) in which to process a check. I asked them if there was a desert between each desk and they had to go out and catch themselves a camel in order to transfer paper from one desk to another. My humor wasn't quite appreciated.

Did I mention I hate insurance people and the people that work with them? (I guess that makes me hate myself but on some mornings here, I really do)

 
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Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Wedding Album

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Was poking around the Picasa site and just realized I could embed the photo album here.

Enjoy.


 
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Wedding Feast

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So after the quick nuptials, Bratworse and I head back... stupidly (and yes, it was MY idea) ... to Apple and wandered in line again. This time, there was a really obnoxious parent behind me, who made sure to let his kid know how much of a sacrifice he was making to stand there in line. What a huge difference in parenting methods. Earlier that morning, we had experienced one cool parent. Now we were subjected to the braying of this asshole. I wanted to apologize to the kid and say, not all of us adults are asshats like his dad. But... it was none of my businesss.

After close to three hours and after both of my calves cramped up in the stiff wind, I told Bratworse, let's get out of here. I was exhausted and we still had a dinner to go to.

Bratworse was an angel throughout this whole ordeal of the iphones. Me, not so much.

E&B had gotten us this wonderful wonderful Japanese hotel room with japanese baths and so we checked in, and got ready for dinner. Gorgeous G was the first to show, then Ranger Robb and her girlfriend, Playwright. So after, Ditzy and her husband showed up, then Ol' Time Hippie showed up with her new (and hopefully permanent cause we all approve!) gf. Lastly, Writerboy showed up, sans wife. *sniff* Writerboy's wife was home sick unfortunately.

Writerboy kindly took a picture of the whole table but I wish he was in it as well.

Much fun was to be had by all, and it was a good night.

Oh... iPhones? Yeah, we did get two... on Sunday.

 
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Wedding Photos

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So, were you wondering how the big day went?

July 11, 2008 will go down in infamy, I believe for the Cholotto Family.

First off, we went hoofing it down to the Apple store at 7:00 for the 8:00 Apple Store opening for our new iphones. Well, we found out the people at the front of the line got there at 5:00 am. Thus we were about the 200th people in line. By the time the store opened, the line had doubled.

During the course of the next few hours, we met a VERY VERY cool lady and her 15 year old son. This lady took a day off work to help her son purchase an iphone. She's also part of a local Berkeley band AND a geologist working in environmental conservation. Too cool. Wish I got her name. We also noted that the Apple store was eerily like Hotel California that day. You saw people entering but few leaving. AND the few that left that morning, none of them looked remotely elated. Strange we thought. We also found out that having cool people in line with you, just makes the process that much happier.

At 11:00 with about 30 people still in line, we decided that there was no way we could get out of the store in time to get married at the pre-ordained time, so with heartfelt congratulations ringing in our ears as we left, we made our way to the Alameda Clerk's office to pick up a license.

My dear friend who has known me since I was 17 was the person officiating at our wedding. Doesn't he look handsome? And to think, this man was a scrawny scrawny boy in his teens.

Well, after we got the license, (timing was perfect!) our best people, E&B showed up with their two children. All of us walked in a general direction and before long, a lake appeared before our eyes. "Let's get married at the lake!" so we all tromped over there. Over the next half an hour, we laughed, cried, hugged, took pictures and signed papers.

Look at how happy we all look.
To be continued.

 
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Monday, July 07, 2008

Weird Sights along the Highway

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The other day, Bratworse and I were driving back from fishing, and along this fairly deserted highway by a line of telephone poles, were a white van and two men. Neither men wore any uniforms (like a PG&E one or a cable one) but one man was in a suit and wearing really dark glasses.

I nudged Bratworse and pointed them to them, asking, "Special Ops?"

Then today, as I'm driving back from lunch, I see two men again with a van but this time it's tan. They're by the roadside which overlooks a development of housing. The distance from the road to the development is probably about 30-40 feet down a steep bank. I see these two men climb over the safety railing, with a pickaxe. A pickaxe, you know, the ones you see dwarves using to mine gems (if you've ever seen Snow White).

So any guess as to what these two groups were up to? My immediate thought for the first one was, warrantless wiretapping/searches by the government. The second... I am simply at a loss to explain. Digging up dead bodies? Ah, the imagination runs amuck.

 
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Wednesday, July 02, 2008

Is It Just Me?

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Or has the air gone out of Raiders' fans?

Everyday I check the Oakland Tribune for some buzz about JaMarcus Russell, or Lane Kiffin, but every day, the same tired headlines greet me. It's friggin' July already. Shouldn't there be write-ups everyday? Or rumors to quash, or rumors to start up? Hell, even I might even welcome some lament about how we let Randy Moss get away (actually, that's going too far. The Raiders' do not miss *that* kind of egotistical non-contributor).

The crickets are chirping here in Oakland.

Still, all my senses are honed for the onslaught of preseason football. After all, isn't that what HD is truly for? To see with visceral clarity, exactly how that knee drove into someone's back?

Let's just hope the Oakland Raiders will surprise us all. A winning season anyone? Anyone?

 
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