Thursday, March 26, 2009

Reason Why I Support Unions

I've never been in a union (worker's union that is) but my sister has been part of the L.A. Teacher's Union since the 80s. One day, my dad and I were at the dinner table when my sister walked up. I asked her if she was about to go on strike (this was YEARS ago, at least eight) and she nodded yes. On a sudden whim, I turned to my father and asked him what he thought about unions.

My father was very curt if he spoke in English. Part of it is that his English just wasn't good. Part of it was just his nature. He didn't waste words if he had to - a good explanation for why we didn't really communicate. I talked too much and I could never get enough out of him so why bother. I do wonder if he ever thought about how everything about him and I were about missed opportunities.

Anyway, this marked one of the rare times I asked my father his opinion. Since this more concerned Ka, my sis (Ka is my nickname for her) I had no qualms about asking him his opinion. Usually if my dad shared his thoughts, it seemed (to me) to signify disapproval.

This exchange certainly proved no different. He signified his disapproval by grunting. (Oh Jeeze! I'm grunting like him now!) Both my sister and I turned to him in surprise. Since this was my sister, we had both expected him to be proud of her. (My sister was always my dad's princess but I shared his love of gadgetry plus I felt so guilty over my mom's overt preference of me I never minded her place with him.)

Dad just shrugged at us and said, "I'm management."

By the way, I loved how succinct my dad always were. With those two words, he explained where his stance was, why his stance was his stance, and why he never spoke about her being in the union and about to go on strike. My sister was about to explain to him where her position when she too realized just how vast his gesture of silence was. She just nodded at him and the subject of unions was never again brought up in his presence.

All this doesn't explain why I support unions but just gives a bit of family background.

The reason I support unions boils down to this: one day, I may be in a position to need a union and you know something? I want them to fight for me.

Almost forgot: the relevancy of this post? FedEx has just threatened to NOT buy US planes because of the possible passage of laws that make organizing easier.

They basically like being the behemoth to the sole worker.


Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Wrote Congresswoman Lee

Wrote Congresswoman Lee a long letter regarding my loan. Now to write Senators Boxer and Feinstein (though I expect a lot less from those two). Had to do something. Was getting too pissed about the entire thing


Monday, March 23, 2009

Bratworse and I did some redecorating this past weekend for Black-Eye Pea.

I really liked the way we did our design this time.



Remember that at the beginning of March, I asked Citimortgage aka Shittimortgage to correct what THEY had sent in to the credit bureaus? Okay, to refresh your memory, 2-1/2 years ago, we got into a dispute with Shittimortgage. We had thought we made all our payments that year but due to changing banks and whatnot, we had actually missed a payment.

We got into a dispute with them, then realized our mistake, made the payments and lo and behold, we are NOT IN DEFAULT with them.

So along comes this blurb on our credit reports that we got into a dispute. Well, I asked Citibank ... ahem Shittibank to take the dispute off the records and they said, okay, all you have to do is write us. So I did.

And what did I get in the mail today, 20 days after I had written them?

A letter DATED March 2, 2009 that was MAILED OUT on the 23rd that informed me, sorry, Shittimortgage won't remove the dispute but if I wanted to, I could contact the credit bureaus.


Thanks for delaying my loan two weeks! Thanks for making me PAY MORE INTEREST to these firms that I have high interest rates from. GODS I didn't think anyone could make me hate more than insurance companies but the banks are SURE competing for this hatred!



Saturday, March 21, 2009

Playing Games with Strangers on Facebook

Some of you know that I've gotten heavily into Facebook recently.

I'm connecting with old friends, some from my childhood, some from my early career jobs and well basically from all walks of life. (When I start to think about all my friends who DON'T Facebook, it really starts astounding me just how many people I've connected with in the course of my life.)

However, what I've come to realize it, I'm enjoying playing with strangers rather than my friends/acquaintances. Friends complain when you send them invitation to new games. Strangers who signed up on forums to get their friendships up, don't mind the invites. They're the ones who WANT to try out new games and find the next fun thing on Facebook.

And so, my friends list consist of 400+ strangers, with about 150 friends/acquaintances. And out of those 400+ strangers, I get regular invitations from about 30 of them. They recognize that I have the power to block those applications if I don't want the notices anymore and so they invite, send with wild abandon.

And I am ever so grateful to them. From them, I'm finding out what the hottest latest games on Facebook is.

Above is SuperPoke! Pets. It's about the ONLY game I'm really playing with my friends. You go visit their pets and if you do, you both get rewarded. With this game, if they are your friend, you get to see their pet without any effort on your part (I think that's why I'm actually playing with friends.)

Other games, you actually have to invite them to join your mob/squad/zoo connection etc. Hence the motivation to play with strangers who have stated outright (by caring enough to write on a forum) that they want and like to play these types of games.


Thursday, March 19, 2009

Update on the Loan

The appraisal we had gotten was missing some information so my broker gets in touch with the guy who did the appraisal. Turns out the poor man had a stroke and of course couldn't fill out the missing parts.

So NOW, we have to get a different appraiser, have them come to the house and inspect it and now, with prices falling so much between Jan. and now, I wonder if the places nearby are still selling for as much as it had been in Jan. (Shit, I'm getting stressed thinking about it.)

The loan is now pushed back to next week and well Tahoe's now out.

Our broker keeps saying, just borrow from your savings so you can afford Tahoe. You can pay it back later but doesn't he realize this is EXACTLY the attitude that got the U.S. economy in trouble. We will not borrow from our savings to pay for a vacation now.

Bah! I hope all bankers/loan officers/assholes get papercuts on their tongues and eat jalapenos afterwards.


Wednesday, March 18, 2009

An Exercise in Frustration for Getting a New Loan

Around December 16th or 17th, I talked to a mortgage broker about refinancing. Told him our situation: I have a condo, very little left in the mortgage, my wife has student loans about to be due and I have a ton of equity in the house. Adding it all up, the broker was ecstatic. This was a gimme. Our mortgage is about less than 1/7th of what our place is worth (I bought in 1993 and never refinanced), our school loans added the debt up to about just over half of the equity and I make about 1/4th of what our loan amount was going to be.

Should've been a cakewalk, right?

Well, now it's March 18th, exactly three months later and do we have the loan? No. Are we throwing good money into the ether by paying interest rates on loans we're planning on paying off with the new house loan? Yes.

Here's what happened with the first guy. Yes, I'm on my second broker and that was part of the problem but in a Karmic kind of way, we were blessed when we changed brokers.

In Jan. the first lender calls me up to say that we're locked in at a 5.5% interest rate. "Huh?" I asked, knowing that rates were about the 4.75 to 5% range. He convinces me that this is the absolute lowest we can go (This entire time, I distrusted what he was saying) then tells me what I need to do. I go ahead and do what is needed and then waited. And waited. And waited.

Two weeks after I was supposed to have gotten the loan docs, I called him up and asked what was going on. He replied that the association was slow in getting the paperwork to us. I asked why didn't he call me and enlisted my help since he knew the student loans were coming due and that I didn't want to pay interest on those loans. He just hemmed and hawed.

Two days later, he calls me up and says "Umm, trouble. Because your condo has a 29% tenant occupancy, this lender won't give you the loan. However! I can get you another loan."

I gave him until noon the next day to tell me there was a solution. He called me at 12:02 and tells me that there wasn't a solution, BUT he's working on it. I fired his ass and called up my senators to complain about the arbitrariness of assigning 25% tenant occupancy as a condition for giving out loans to OBVIOUSLY qualified individuals.

My new broker then gets me a 4.5% rate. This confirmed to me that first broker was full of shit.

Everything is chugging along decently when, due to a DISPUTE I STARTED 2-1/2 years ago, which OBVIOUSLY had been settled because the property didn't go into foreclosure and we are current with our payments, my credit reports get flagged and the loan stopped dead in its tracks. I call up my mortgage company, get them to rescind that little blurb in the credit reports and then find out that two of the three credit agencies DIDN'T remove the dispute notice.

So two credit agencies (Experian and Transunion) are holding my loan hostage due to the fact that they can't update credit reports in a timely manner.

My broker just called me up a day ago to say that the account manager at the lending co. has figured out how to bypass this little hurdle.

It turns out that Fannie Mae's underwriting program cares about these little items but Freddie Mac's underwriting program doesn't. (We're talking SOFTWARE programs here). And apparently even though HUMANS can see the dispute as something to be disregarded (for it makes no difference), software cannot be bypassed by humans. However, there was a debt to income ration that Freddie Mac cared about.

Someone had entered in the student loans as debts that still will be incurred AFTER we get the loan, so that made my debt skyhigh. It's now fixed and supposedly, I'm to get loan docs tomorrow or Friday.

You know, I'm not going to hold my breath. I should've just declared myself a bank holding company. Bah! Oh and if this loan doesn't come in, there goes our vacation in Tahoe next weekend.


Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Myth #5 and taking a break

Well, Chapters 1 and 2 of Myth #5 work. Chapter 3 totally falls apart. So, I shall be rewriting Chapter 3 tonight and working on Myth #6. I've decided on making Myths 5 days a week instead of 7 for after all, why was Sunday and weekends invented?

I would appreciate any feedback whatsover but since there's like two people reading this, I shan't expect any. Still, it would be nice, eh?


Rather Handsome Fellow

Bratworse was asked to do a small silhouette of a male and female for her internship. She's despairing because well she feels she has to do a bang-up job for this, this being her internship. Me, I hear the words "small" and "silhouette" and I'm thinking, oh, like anyone is going to be able to tell from a SMALL silhouette what gender it is.

So knowing that my honey's having a bad day (there's been a sad fairy visiting our house lately. One day, she'll decide that I'm to be the one that's sad. For the last couple of days it's been Bratworse. The sad fairy is welcome at our house, Goddhas know it's not welcome at most houses, but I do wish someone else would welcome it for a while. We want some happiness, some time) I helpingly suggested to her the following:

Me: <--- thinks you should get a silhouette of a monkey and use that since it'll be shrunk and no one can tell what it is
Bratworse: if they end up going with the sillhouette stuff, it won't be good that they came from the public.
Me: Well I think you can just take one from the public and manipulate it, and put a milk mustache on the guy's silhouette just in case people can't tell it's a guy since it'll be shrunk

So then I do some searching around the public and found the above picture and IM it to her.

BW: rofl
Me: I made my honey laugh?
Me: Really?
BW: Really really.
Me: *dances around pleased with herself*
Me: I thought that was a rather handsome fellow

And what do I get for all my troubles?

BW: it's a good thing you like girls


Sunday, March 15, 2009

Myth #5

Twin Paradox

Chapter One

From the second Quiyus felt the orgasmic thrust of Majaks, the Goddha of Land, Air and Water inside Quiyus' still-female form, It knew this union would have physical consequences. And though Quiyus, the Goddha of Creation, Destruction and Maintenance had reverted back to a genderless form, within days the result of the coupling between the first Goddhas of the world showed.

The progeny inside Quiyus took well to being created and grew rapidly within. Quiyus' form contorted and stretched as It accommodated the somewhat parasitic growth inside It.

It was at this time, Majaks, still reeling from the impact of Its own transformation from dead human male to Its present actuality, disappeared to experiment with what It had been tasked with to be the Goddha of - the Land, the Air and the Water. Quiyus at first felt sympathetic with Majaks' predicament for it must be hard on anyone's psyche, much less one who now could move mountains with a shift of Its whimsy.

After three months though, Quiyus' patience wore down to frayed strands as the pregnancy seemed to have taken an accelerated turn and enlarged exponentially rather than linearly. Majaks was nowhere to be found and moving about was incredibly hard for a Goddha of Quiyus' present bulk. It needed help, Goddhadamnit.

But weeks dragged on and became months and still, Majaks stayed away. Majaks, in Its defense, actually had no idea that Quiyus was with child; It had just stayed away because It had reached a point with Quiyus where the mere presence of Quiyus would set off nearby earthquakes, sandstorms and other ill nature. It merely thought the separation would be a good thing for the world.

Yet as time strode past, the separation did more harm than good, for Quiyus' temper was by now fully foul. And as Goddha of Destruction, there was much that Quiyus could do to transfer the anger. To mollify Its feelings of abandonment, It created swarms of locusts and infestations of viruses but alas, the destruction caused by their presence didn't alleviate Its loneliness. To help assuage Its loneliness, It tasked the Angels and Demons to obey only Goddhas but as they became mindless and soulless creatures, Quiyus found their presence more and more intolerable as they were only capable of parroting back instructions.

Where Quiyus was, the world was a desolate place. And where Majaks was, the world was a wondrous paradise.
Chapter Two

After a while, Majaks felt keenly the difference between being a Goddha, and being a mortal. Being a Goddha meant that though It could appreciate all that was happening around It, to be a part of it took energy - energy that was better off spent in the maintenance of Its domain rather than the participation of it.

The loneliness as well as the feeling of alienation weighed heavily on Majaks and finally, It could not withstand the pressure and sought out Quiyus' company, the only other being in the world who might fathom what it was like to be this Other being. To Its surprise, It heard its own name being cursed, carried on the winds when the distance between It and Quiyus diminished with each of Its step.

Why would Quiyus be cursing Majaks? The last time Majaks saw Quiyus, It had been asleep in the after-bliss of their union. What could've have changed so much that instead of yelling out professions of love, Quiyus would be wishing Majak disease and pain?

The answer greeted Majaks as soon as It stepped upon the Land that Quiyus lay recumbent on. The enormous strips of deadened Land all led to one beginning, like spokes in a wheel. Quiyus had made sure all surrounding knew of Its displeasure and waves of anger and hatred and disgust emanated from where Quiyus was.

"Oh, Quiyus!" Majaks exclaimed the moment It beheld the burgeoning form. Majaks ran to Quiyus' side and scooped the pregnant Goddha into Its arms all the while whispering, "Oh Quiyus, I had no idea. Can you ever forgive me for staying away so long."

At first Quiyus struggled against Majaks' embrace screaming, 'No, I hate you! You abandoned me.. Us!" But as Majaks tightened Its clutch with each accusation, Quiyus' voice lost more and more venom. The screams of anger and hatred became sobs of anguish, loss and finally forgiveness.

Their tight embrace shifted into one of passion, absolution and desire as the two Goddhas finally celebrated what would be their joint creation.

As the final months of the pregnancy passed, the look about Quiyus had changed so remarkably that the Land churned in creativity and produced strands of desert that looked like someone painted it, and nearby shallow oceans burst forth with coral reefs of every color and size. Even the Air partook in Quiyus' and Majaks' joy which resulted in the Aurora Borealis.
Chapter Three

The world during this time of Quiyus' and Majaks' honeymoon saw unprecedented growth and stunning diversity. Often the creations were one-of-a-kind, like the phoenix or the unicorn, but sometimes, like in the unicorn's case, it found a way to replicate itself, but that's a story for another time. Both things under Quiyus' care and Majaks' care found ways to express these Goddha's exquisite delight in each other, made so much stronger by the separation and subsequent longing.

Too soon did this idyllic moment pass for before long, Quiyus felt the first birth pangs. Even for a Goddha, giving birth to another that will be an equal is a painful process. As Quiyus gave into the pain and allowed Itself to be split open, Majaks peered through the opening and witnessed not one but two heads emerging. "Quiyus, brace yourself. There's double trouble."

Majaks reached in and helped ease the twins emergence from Quiyus. Quiyus, near faint from the effort, asked to hold the infants but Majaks seemed reluctant to hand them over. "Remember that our union was one that had tumultous times, my love."

"And what is that supposed to mean, Majaks? Hand me my children."

Quiyus both heard and felt a snip as the umbillical cord was severed and into Its outstretched arms, a heavy bundle settled. Opening Its eyes, the Goddha of Creation, Destruction and Maintenance gazed upon Its firstborns.

The twins were cojoined, but where it was cojoined was impossible to pinpoint, for the joint seemed to rove all over both the twins bodies. At first, the twins were joined at the head, then the back, then one was joined at the buttock to the other's side, and so on. Entranced, Quiyus stared so blatantly until one of the twins spoke up, "Hey, Ma. You gonna feed us or what?" The other giggled and laughed and poked Its twin saying, "Shhh, It's trying to get used to us."

The first twin jabbed a thumb over at Majaks and said to Its twin, "That one's no better. It's gawking too. Think we're ever gonna be fed?"

"Urkthak! Be patient and have a little trust. Sheesh, how're you going to ever be in control of peace, war or communication without patience or trust?"

"Bah, Mujenvi. You really make me hate you sometimes, you know? Why, I ought to..." And with that, Urkthak swung around so that It was connected to Its twin by the front of Its torso but Mujenvi swung deftly away laughing Mujenvi was now connected to Urkthak by Its foot. Urkthak swung Its fists helplessly at Mujenvi before breaking into tears and Mujenvi quickly moved back around to comfort Urkthak.

During then entire episode, both Majaks and Quiyus watched with mouths agape and then when Mujenvi embraced Urkthak, the feeling of love overcame the entire family and the parents wrapped their arms around the children, who loved them back.

As Mujenvi and Urkthak slept after they had fed, Quiyus looked at Majaks and said, "Well, I guess it's decided then. Mujenvi's the Goddha of Love, Hate and Desire. I'm sure it was Mujenvi who helped us overcome our fascination with them."

Majaks nodded and said, "Urkthat was born from that period of time when I had left. We will have to be careful with that one... Trust does not seem to come easy to that one. Mujenvi was wise to have seen that Urkthat is to be the Goddha of Peace, War and Communications."

As both of them went to sleep in each other's arms, the same thought went through each others' heads. What does it mean that Love, Hate and Desire is tethered to Peace, War and Communication?


Saturday, March 14, 2009

Myth #4

Two Goddhas are Better than One

Chapter One

Quiyus, the Goddha of Creation, Destruction and Maintenance distracted Itself from the unusual pairings by making sure no two insects were alike when It heard laughter in the distance. Interrupting Itself, Quiyus went to inspect the source of the laughter. Where Quiyus walked, one foot would leave destruction in its wake whereas the other foot would leave new creations in its footsteps.

The laughter that drew Quiyus was inviting, raucous and in a way, sexy. Quiyus felt Itself stirred in ways that It had never experienced prior to this moment and It wondered for a moment just what was being created here. Shrugging off the slightly disturbing thought, Quiyus followed the sound to a clearing in the forest and there, a male human knelt, hunched over an anthill.

Quiyus breathed in sharply for this male human took Its breath away. The man was poking at the anthill, obviously delighting in Quiyus' hard work in developing different varieties of insects. He was picking up one ant at a time, admiring the diversity that swarmed this one hill.

As Quiyus approached, It created an outer skin for Itself to reflect an object of the man's desire and thus, Quiyus changed into a woman. She stopped at a clear puddle to glance at Her own reflection and nodded. It was a good skin; Her creativity was serving her well.

At the sound of Her approach, the man turned and gasped at the vision before him. Quiyus was everything he didn't even realized he desired, and instantly, the man reflected his desire for Quiyus. A welcoming smile from Quiyus was all that the man needed as encouragement and he grasped at Quiyus' wrist, pulling Her to him.

For the next two months, the only creativity, destruction or maintenance that Quiyus engaged in, involved this man, whom Quiyus now named Majaks. Time stood still for these two, as they sensed, felt or thought of no one else but each other; but that was not the case for the rest of the world.

Without guidance from Quiyus, earthquakes devasted entire swaths of Land, volcanoes showed up under Water and out of the Air came fireballs and iceballs. Species were still inter-mingling with abandon, creating such creatures as fairies and brownies, centaurs and satyrs, minotaurs and giants. In short, the world seemed to be going through birth pangs and death throes at the same time.

Chapter Two

Quiyus and Majaks continued their lust/love affair with wild abandon until one morning, Quiyus and Majaks were jolted awake by an earthquake that devastated the surrounding Land. Quiyus leapt to Her feet with Goddha-like speed and whisked Herself to safety but Majaks was crushed under a toppling tree.

"Majaks, my love!" screamed Quiyus as She clutched at his dead body. Another shudder of the Land was Her response and it was then that She realized how neglectful of Her duties She had been. Had She been more mindful of maintenance, then Majaks would have survived.

Mad with grief and self-recriminations, Quiyus beat at her chest as her tears fell into the crevice created by the earthquake and became diamonds. With defiance at what She perceived as a Goddha's ill luck, She raised Her hands and lifted Her voice loudly proclaiming, "Majaks rise! Rise and become Goddha of that which caused your death. Rise and become my partner, my soul-mate, my Goddha of Land, Air and Water!"

And with that, Majaks stirred under the giant log which had crushed his mortal form, and transformed into a Goddha, one with a morphable form. The form Majaks took was pleasurable to Quiyus and immediately they fell to an embrace.

But their coupling took on a different energy and instead of neglectful, the energy produced by Quiyus' and Majaks twinning settled the seemingly seething anger that lived just under the surface of Land, Air and Water. Though Quiyus loved Majaks with all Its heart, Majaks had changed when he metamorphosized from a dead man to a live Goddha. There were times when Majaks could not look at Quiyus even in the middle of the most heated and passionate intercourse. But what could it be?

Could it be that Majaks resented that Quiyus was the Goddha who created It, and not the other way around? Could it be that Majaks resented being created whereas Quiyus Itself had been a transformed Goddha? Could it be that Majaks did not ask for the responsibility over Land, Air and Water? Whatever it was, Majaks would never tell Quiyus the truth, leading to many destructive times. But oh, when they did make up, what wondrous creations would come of their joint efforts.

For whatever its worth, the union between Quiyus and Majaks survived far longer than anyone would've guessed and that would have included their offsprings.


Friday, March 13, 2009

Myth #3

Why Takla Became Quiyus
or How Humans came About

Chapter One

The Goddha of Nothing, Something and Other, Takla looked around Itself and beheld Its creations before It, revelling in the sight, the joy, the sheer chaos that greeted Its being. But It sensed the chaos might undo all that It beheld and felt Itself begin to transform.

Reaching out with Its being, It left a bit of Itself inside Everything - all of the Somethings that existed and then It became Nothing itself. Takla was no more. It gave everything It had to Its creations and so, transformed Itself from the Godda of Nothing, Something and Other, into an Other Goddha.

Takla metamorphosized into Quiyus, the Goddha of Creation, Destruction & Maintenance.

Quiyus was indeed Other, for though the concept of three resided within Its form, the form instead reflected a binary nature. Quiyus, like most of Takla's creations, had two eyes, two ears, two nostrils, two arms and two legs. Takla was tricky for It hid that nature of three within solo items - the heart, the mouth and the brain of Quiyus.

Quiyus was in awe of Its now gone predecessor. And to celebrate/honor Takla's existence, Quiyus made Its first creation - a reflection of what Quiyus looked like. Three things came of Quiyus' homage: Humans who lived on the Land, Angels/Demons who lived in the Air, and Merpeople who lived in the Water.

The transformation of Takla from Something into Nothing into Other was complete. It was now fully Quiyus, the Goddha of Creation, Destruction and Maintenance.

Chapter Two

Quiyus explored what It was, for all this was new to It. It seemed to have a body that existed within time yet with exertion followed by exhaustion, It could move outside of time. It looked at Its own creations, the humans, the angels and demons, and the merpeople and saw that like Takla, Quiyus' own creative powers could take on a life of their own.

Everywhere Quiyus looked, It could see evidence of Its own genius. In the Angels and Demons, It saw perfect servants who'll work for It without question. The MerPeople were Its proof of being able to create wild people and Humans were the confirmation that they could be the perfect counter-balance to all that could possibly go wrong.

Why, in fact, the final perfect touch would be to make Creation an automated action. With a great flourish of Its arms, Quiyus declared, "Let there be PRO-Creation!" And with that declation, all the creatures of the world turned to each other and began the dance of life.

Turning to Takla's creations, Quiyus added detail and nuance to each and every one of them. Absorbed in Its own creative abilities, It failed to realized that things were getting quickly out of Its control. Everything Takla had created were attracted to everything else, and out of these strange pairings, creatures like the platypus were popping out of eggs!

A braying startled Quiyus out of Its concenctration. A horse was eyeing a donkey and the donkey was backing away, braying. As Quiyus realized what forces It had released with the creation of procreation, It moved to action.

Quickly, Quiyus released Its Destructive nature and out of the Waters came hurricanes battering the creatures out of their ardor, and out of the Land came volcanoes spewing lava in hopes of separating coupled beings and out of the sky came lighning bolts that sparked apart pairings. But still, the fervor of all the various beings could not be dampened.

With a sigh and a turn of Its head to avoid looking at the future, Quiyus handed a human his first spear.


Thursday, March 12, 2009

Myth #2

How the Land, Air & Water Came About

Chapter 1

As Its first creation, the chicken flitted about Takla flapping and pecking, Takla the Goddha of Nothing, Something and Other, wondered if It should create Something more out of the Nothing that surrounded It and the chicken. But which Something should It create? Takla floated in the Nothingness consumed by this weighty question that seemed to beg a more dignified answer than what Its mind created for the first creature - the chicken.

Takla turned to the chicken and said, "For the honor and the punishment of being the first creature created, you will be a forever sought animal. Your males will be sought for the song they bring. Your flesh will appeal to all and your unborn's food will be made of a miracle slippery substance that all will want to consume as well."

Being pleased with Its pronouncement, Takla returned to Its ruminations and as the thoughts darted about from possibility to possibility, Nothing seemed to happen and Something took shape. The swirling emptiness tore into millions of little tiny pieces all about Takla and the chicken. Behind the millions of little bits of Nothing, Something else was happening. Larger pieces of Nothing were morphing into bigger pieces of Something. Some had gills, some had paws. Some had beaks, some fangs. Takla's imagination was having fun.

Even as Takla watched fascinated, the thoughts took on an Other life and took flight, taking their resemblance from the chicken but unlike the chicken was not an awkward flapping hopping creature but rather magnificent creatures that used their wings to swoop and soar and some creatures to flock together to create an Other illusion of being larger then they actually were.

Soon there was almost Something everywhere, and Takla frowned.

If Nothing disappeared, then wouldn't Its creatures be bored like It, for It has experienced unchange for eons?

Takla stopped the direction of Its earlier thoughts and tried to separate all the Somethings around but to no avail. What to do... what to do?

Chapter 2

Out of the Nothing that was between the Somethings, came something solid and something liquid and something gaseous.

Looking at the Something forming, Takla at once knew what to do. It commanded to the creatures that could flap its limbs, "Take to the Air but know that you need the Land to sleep on and the Water to be of sustenance."

Looking at the creatures who had gills and fins, Takla commanded them to "Take to the Water, but know that the Land is needed to contain the Water and the Air is needed however you may not realize you draw from it."

Speaking to the creatures who had neither wings nor fins, Takla commanded them to "Take to the Land, but know that the Air is needed for you to breathe and the Water is needed to sustain you."

Upon Its word... Nothing happened.

And Takla realized Its mistake. Nothing told the creatures what they were, so by calling them Something, they hadn't realized It was speaking to them.

Instead, Takla slashed through the Nothing towards the creatures that had wings and pointed to the Air.

It then slashed through the Nothing towards the creatures that had gills and pointed to the Water.

Lastly, It slashed through the Nothing towards the remaining creatures and pointed at the Land.

Of course, with such broad gestures, there would be a few overlaps, which is why there exists such things as squirrels that fly, frogs that glide, water snakes, birds that walk instead of fly. The creatures separated as gestured by Takla, onto and into the Land, Air and Water.

And Takla was pleased that he had managed to keep parts of Nothing still alive within the Somethings that now encompassed almost everything.


Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Explaining the Previous Post

I'm trying out a new story and it involves creating a whole new mythos. I've thrown together a few ideas and will be trying it out here so look for posts under The Myths. The first is a quick parable about how the Godda (that world's version of a God/Goddess) of Nothing, Something & Other creates a chicken out of nothing.

This will be the spark that ignites the other stories or in another metaphor, sets things in motion. I'm letting my muse run through me and I'm just letting her have fun. Bratworse is helping and creating with me, but I think the words will be mine. The ideas will be both, but the magic in delivery... that which I find so delicious. I get that. :)

Enjoy and let me know what you think. I'll be putting more up.

Oh, until I figure out how to put a sound file up, these will be quicktime audios without any picture. You guys don't need to see me blush.


Trying Out a New Story

Myth 1: The First Creation

In the beginning, there was Nothing and Takla felt empty. Would Nothing fill this emptiness, It thought for the first time as the emptiness finally threatened Its very sanity. A scary thought filled Its mind as It pondered for a fleeting second if sanity had already taken hold and all that was about to happen was a moot point. Takla shook the thought off as It pondered what its options were.

To continue with the vast emptiness was insanity for sure, but what is insanity to a Godda and should It fear insanity? As thoughts swirled around like... like...

A picture formed in Takla's thoughts.

These thoughts... they had a shape. And the shape... was a pecking motion as if something was propelling it forward insistently, looking for... sustenance.

AAs the motion formulated in Takla's thoughts, the vast emptiness stirred, and the vast emptiness too started swirling, swirling into a pecking motion following Takla's thoughts. And Takla was pleased - It had made the transformation into becoming An Other - the Goddha of Nothing, Something and Other.

Takla let the thoughts gather force and before long, the pecking motion was solidified into a beak, and that beak was followed by head, which just for fun had a wiggling and waving comb gracing down the back. The neck under the pecking head belonged to a round plump and feathery body, and again, just for Takla's own amusement, was supported on spindly legs that spread into four splayed toes.

And this answers the question, which came first: the chicken or the egg.


Friday, March 06, 2009

Saints Row Glitch


OMG! Too funny. We finished a mission on Saints Row 2 during while our protagonist was on fire. Well a glitch occurs and for the remainder of the time, our protagonist has sort of become The Human Torch. We are not of course, the first ones to discover this glitch, as evidenced by this search.

What was friggin' great was that the protagonist could set people on fire, yet drive a convertible with the flames spilling down the back all over the henchman without burning him up. Meanwhile, cars moved out of your way, the entire dialogue of surrounding people reflects the fiery state with questions like, "Does that hurt?" "God is punishing you." "I'm getting tired of your screaming." (This was due to the protagonist screaming her head off and yet her health status bar didn't move a millimeter)

So does that make us inured to violence? No, because I view this in the same way I view Bugs Bunny violence. It's not real.

By the way, Saints Row 2 is a great stoner's game. It's fun, challenging but yet forgiving in lots of ways and great as an audience game as well.


Thursday, March 05, 2009

Watching the Prop 8 Debate


9:20 - Ut oh, is that the best we can do?
9:30 - Are the judges trying to get the specific answers they want?
9:40 - Will the judges let them finish a sentence?
11:30 - I have a sinking feeling about this.
11:45 - (time skewed cause I put it on pause) WTF? Ken Starr is saying we're not invalidating the marriages, we're just not recognizing them and by not recognizing them, they're now invalid. But we're not invalidating them. FUCK YOU Ken Starr.


Wednesday, March 04, 2009

Tang & Bubbles

For about half a year, we've had a hard time getting a castle drawbridge bubbler to work in our tank properly when it finally tilted the right way. Now the drawbridge stays down, trapping the bubbles until the bubbles get big enough to lift the drawbridge, releasing the bubbles.

About a week ago, Lone Wolf came over and was checking out the tank when she exclaimed, "Is the Tang swimming through the bubbles?" I made a non-committal grunt when Bratworse replied, "Yes, it's been playing with the bubbles lately."

Curious, both Lone Wolf and I leaned in for a closer look.

"It's biting at the bubbles!" One of us cried out.

Not only that, but the tang was carrying bubbles in its mouth and releasing them a bit aways. When did the blue tang start exhibiting strange behavior? I thought and my thoughts were echoed by Bratworse: "Think the blue tang is playing or is it showing signs of being in a tank for too long?"

So, what do you think? Is the Blue Tang playing with the bubbles? Trying to kill the bubbles? Or just having a bubble fetish?


Sunday, March 01, 2009

Putting on Old Skins

This past weekend, I visited WonderCon - it had been my first time since 1999? 2000? Maybe as late as 2001?

The old skin was probably ill-fitting for the most part, but on the other hand, the joy with which greetings were exchanged seemed to indicate that no one seemed to notice. Perhaps politeness on their part but perhaps my hasty apologies about working for "the man" let them know the depths with which I let go of my old profession.

For the past 8 years, the only creativity afforded me at my job was cut and paste jobs in which some measure of pleasure could be derived but for the most part, were bereft of any spark of creativity. My outlet was here, and even so, cheated my creative side simply by measure of these posts are more stream of consciousness more than anything else.

Due to the ill-fitting nature of my old skin, and due to the comfort it offered, the Cholotto family has instituted a new rule. If one of us feels like being creative, the other must follow suit and be creative as well. We are now extending it to visitors as well.

Let see if modifying the old skins will one, make them more fitting, secondly, more profitable, and thirdly, more pleasurable than this thing that I currently call a job.

Photo from this article on "Artic History - Land Use"


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