Wednesday, August 30, 2006

What was That about Turnabout is Fair Play?

My sister apparently is experiencing Asthma for the first time in her life. She has shortness of breath, and is breathing very shallowly. I remember her not understanding the concern for my health and feeling that I must be faking, in order to get what I wanted. About 8 years ago, I finally turned to her and said, "You know what I truly wanted as a kid? To be able to be outdoors all the time, and play in the neighborhood." She threw me a puzzled look of dawning realization. "Oh? I could do that, but all I wanted was to be left alone to read." I just replied, "Well, maybe neither of us got what we wanted."

She was never sympathetic while we were growing up. I don't think she is now. But I do hope she understands that no, I wasn't faking all those years just to get Mom and Dad's attention - that in fact, I was horrified to have this unwarranted, undeserved attention.

I was never sympathetic towards her attitude about heat. I was always cold, so how could I understand what heat was like to her. She was always hot.

I have been experiencing hot flashes, and in combination with driving under a hot sun, then waiting... well, let's just say Bratworse has every right to be mifffed at me right now. I lose my cool, so to speak. I am irritated beyond belief that there is no relief from the inescapable heat that threatens to sizzle my skin from the muscles on out. I feel the flush in my cheeks and experience the sweat pouring down my back, and sense my temper straining at the gates, looking for a target to rub on, to rub itself raw of this heat.

I have a lot of empathy towards my sister now for when she had to suffer because my asthma couldn't deal with sleeping in an air-conditioned room. I understand now, why she snaps so quickly at perceived jabs.

What was that about Turnabout? Hopefully my sister will come out all this okay, sans asthma. I hope this shortness of breath is a temporary thing, just there to instill insight and that's all. I hope my inability to control my temper due to hot flashes will pass and I will regain control over the beast. Maybe turnabout isn't the best thing.



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